Faux Blog

a journal excerpt from BloggityBlogBlogs: 

Subject: A Girl Named Aqua?
Date: Sept 23 2005
Tags: Weird, Strange, Odd

I met a weird girl this morning, she called herself Aqua, and she saved my life. I was standing waiting for the school bus when a shadowy figure moved from the alley towards me. It looked like the size of a big dog, but it was all black and had glowing red eyes.

Before I had a chance to scream I heard this: KIIIIIYYYYYYAAAAAA! And then this cowboy chick lands infront of me and kicks the shadowy dog into next year. She asked if I was okay and I said yes. I asked her her name and she said: Aqua.

I ran back to the house and told my mom about the rabid dog. And she told me not to tell stories and to get to the stop before I missed the bus. Why don't parents believe us?

Well, since this is English Lit and I should be working on my book report I just wanted to note this strange encounter.

Underground Saints

The subway car shunted down the tunnels taking them to who-knows-where-or-when. It had been a strange few days and Max's world had gone to hell in a handbasket. His ideology and psyche had gone through a major rewrite. As if some unknown program had been hiding in the wetware, and some trigger event had started it running. 

His eyes were tired and the nights and days blurred together into some incoherent 80's music montage. The train was near empty again. Suki was sleeping, curled up on a couple of seats, the Godhammer in her hands. Akimoto was down at the far end exercising. Swinging an imaginary sword in his own imaginary world. 

Max felt a kinship with the others; heck, they were all drawn into this mess by a common thread. But his heart and soul were elsewhere, he could see that in the reflection of the darkness outside.

Max watched the platforms blur into one huge world of their own. He had been watching worker ants who though that they were so important doing their jobs, as if it truly mattered. He didn't envy them waiting. Waiting for their turn to go someplace other than where they were. Thousands of different universes with no clue about the existence of others. All trapped within their own boundaries like a prisoner on an island, ignoring the outside truths. 

Man, I'm so screwed, he thought. Mags, wherever you are, I love thee.

He was jolted back to the current reality, as the subway car came to a stop. The call sign of the station was West Hampton. He reached over and shook Suki; her eyes fluttered open and she brought up the Godhammer. The tip of the barrel touched Max's nose.

"We're here," Max told her with a wink and a slight smile. "Time to get your game face on."

"Cool," was Suki's reply. She lowered the cannon.

Faux News

Increased Security For New City Subway System
by Kate Mallory
Staff Reporter

[New City] -Sept. 23, 2005 -- LEGACY Security Solutions, Inc. , a leading provider of security products and services, announced this morning that it has begun to install a subway video surveillance system as part of a pilot program for the New City Police Department (NCPD). 

"It's time to crack down on the criminal activity that happens in the subways," said Willow Daylen, NCPD spokesperson. "With the recent rash of events that have been going on, LEGACY has stepped forward to offer their services."

The program features covert wireless video surveillance engineered by LEGACY to observe criminal activity underground. Multiple subway locations in the Borough of Manatan will be monitored over the course of the next 60 days, based on historical crime statistics, and the NCPD will also use the new system as a counter-terrorism tool in high profile areas. 

LEGACY's secure, covert technology has already been deployed in three undisclosed subway locations - leading to two arrests within the first hour of operation. 

"It's the dawn of a new age in fighting crime," Markus Control, LEGACY CEO, commented. "The cube affect will be hunted to the max."

When asked to elaborate on the last statement, Control just nodded.

Knicks in Time

Dexter Washington was heading down the stairs to the platform when he heard the subway pulling into the station. This was the train he needed to get him where he was going in time to take in the pre-game festivities. He picked up his pace.

He was in a good mood, having scored Knicks playoff tickets. It had been a very hard day at work and now it was time to relax, take in the game and head to O'Malley's afterwards for a few rounds. 

Once he got lower on the steps, he could see the end car's door beginning to close. He sprinted for the door and stuck his arm forward to stop it from closing completely. There was no way in hell he was going to wait another 20 minutes for the next train.

The door opened and he squeezed through. The car wasn't full. He noticed a funky looking teenaged white girl in a cowboy motif. Looked like she was wearing some huge gauntlets. His eyes scanned the other passengers. A huge fellow decked out in a t-shirt which declared My Kimono Is At The Cleaners. He was sitting down in the middle of the floor in what looked like a yoga position. 

Great, thought Dex. I had to pick a car with circus refugees. 

A weird sensation of deja vu started to tickle at his mind. A feeling of dread slowly rising. He had been having a lot of nightmares lately, and had been working hard to convince himself that they were not, in fact, memories.

That's when he noticed the schoolgirl sitting there; she was reading a text book. Which seemed normal enough to Dex. Alright. Alright, it's okay. 

Which brought his attention to the fellow sitting directly across from the girl. That's when the feeling of dread washed over him like a tidal wave.

"Max?" Dexter said in disbelief.

Max turned and smiled and said casually, "Mr. Washington. I was wondering when we were going to finally meet up again."

"Craptacular!" Dexter said, realizing that he wouldn't be making the Knicks game after all.