Faux News

Man Falls Through Roof
by K. Chadd
Staff Writer

Gerry Attrick had just sat down and was enjoying the local news when someone unexpected dropped in on him.

At 6:40pm, Attrick was sitting down watching the television when a man fell through his ceiling and landed on the couch. 

"I heard this popping sound and then wham this fellow came crashing through the roof," said Attrick. 

Attrick describes the man as late 20's or early 30's, dressed in tattered jeans and a bright red t-shirt with yellow target symbol on it. 

The man got up, shook his head and glanced at Attrick and said he was sorry, then he bolted out the back door.

"It was like it was from some kind of movie," said Attrick. "The man stood up and dusted himself off and asked where he was and then apologized for the disruption."

Attrick said the fellow gave him a ton of money before he left.

A police spokesman said that they are looking into the matter and all flights from the airport reported nothing unusual or no missing passengers.